Elsabe Smit

About Relationships: Letting Go of the Fame You Never Had

Love relationships can end in interesting ways, for example where ordinary people end an ordinary relationship, and then one person becomes famous. Suddenly the ex of an ordinary person becomes the past of a famous person. Very few people in such a si... Read >

About Relationships: Let's Not Argue About Custody

"I want to leave my marriage. Will my husband allow me access to the children when I leave him?" This is a challenging situation because it goes against the norm. People would expect a woman to leave her marriage and by default take the children wit... Read >

How Long Should Marriage Vows Last?

I recently wrote an article in which I explained that any relationship has a natural duration, after which it ends - unless the people in the relationship hold on to the relationship for dear life. This raised a question about marriage vows. Divorce s... Read >

Letting Go of a Relationship

Why is it that we hold on to relationships long past their natural end? Think of a friendship that no longer exists. Do you still remember how your friend insulted or deserted you? You gained new friends, but you still feel that hurt. Remember tha... Read >

Who is in Command?

I am always fascinated about how our questions get answered - and sometimes how we are steered in a direction without even asking the question. Someone very dear and close to me is at a point where he has no dignity or quality of life left. He had tol... Read >

I Love Bullies

Yes, I do. Throughout my life I have had to deal with bullies. Some of my first memories are of my mother mistreating me physically and emotionally. I encountered numerous bullies as colleagues, and too many of them used me for target practice. I als... Read >

Why the Secret Causes Stress

By now we all know the Secret: decide what you want, and believe that it will come your way. The more you believe, the quicker it comes your way. Right? Then why does it not work? Why are we not all very rich and healthy and happy by now? There ar... Read >

Are you doing Job's job?

Here is an interesting piece of information: I looked up the meaning of the word "job" in the dictionary. The meanings included "task, chore, difficulty, problem, trouble, hard time". This reminded me of a biblical figure called Job, whose name means... Read >

How to Live an Authentic Life

Are you living an authentic life? How would you know where to find the answer to this question? Frank Joseph said "Following a vocation, that inner call, is not self-indulgence or an excuse for laziness. Doing what one really wants to do is hard work... Read >

You Deserve a Stress-Free Life!

L Scott Peck wrote a book called "The Road Less Travelled". The first three sentences in the book read "Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it". ... Read >

How to Turn Sleepless Nights into Sweet Dreams

This is a quote from the Wall Street Journal in September 2009: "A recent study reported that 52% of working French don't sleep well on Sunday night. But work-related stress is not a French disease, and is ubiquitous and severe in all developed economies.... Read >

How to have a New Year free of stress

At the time of writing this article, the year 2010 is just over 6 weeks away. That will be the beginning of a new decade. It feels like yesterday when we were celebrating the new millennium and the birth of a new world. What happened to your New Year... Read >

The Truth About Stress Relief

Is life stressful? Yes, of course. Are there ways to relieve stress? Yes, of course. For most people the way to relieve stress is to take a tranquilliser, a sleeping pill, a cigarette or a drink of alcohol. Do any of these crutches relieve stress? ... Read >

How to Love Your Relatives

I come from a family of special souls. We are as different as chalk and cheese. The chalks have beautiful colours. The cheeses have a wide range of textures tastes. Together, we make an interesting, tasty and useful combination. There is nothing th... Read >

Shop Assistants: Our New Conscience

Are you tired from work today? Are you putting your feet up and having a drink? Before you take another sip, let me ask you: who gave you permission to have that drink? If you are saying it is none of my business, you are right. However, if I was ... Read >